The score from thesis defense came out wrong, or at least, different from what I heard it was at the event. I went to the university to speak with Slayer to see what was wrong and why did it change. I was starting to believe that I have misheard what my score actually was and that it had truly been lower than what I expected. When I walked into the office of the archaeology department I greeted the people that were present, which were Sonya and Slayer. I approached Slayer with my question and while I was talking to him, he was squinting his eyes and seemed to be very focused on my face, as if there was very small bug crawling on my face that he was trying to discern. This thing on my face seemed to interest him more than my questions and Slayer answered that he didn’t remember what my score was and that he would have to talk with The Professor about that. I said that I understand and bid them farewell.
“Two fingers”, said Slayer to Sonya, as I was closing the door. Assuming there was no previous conversation between them, and his intent stare, Slayer could have only been talking about some feature of my face, in a language that Slayer thought, only he and Sonya could understand (telepathy, maybe?). Well, it would have been a secret language if it wasn’t Bulgarian. I was pretty used to thinking of people talking ill about me in my absence but found the action of people speaking right in front of me, in what they thought was a secret language extremely hypocritical. That was funny because I’ve always had only respect for Slayer and Sonya (although I didn’t receive a single e-mail for any event from my department from Sonya during my first two years of study, and I know she had it) and until that moment they have been one of the few people that haven’t tried to quite intentionally step on my head.
I think this was the moment when I fully realized the degree of hypocrisy my teachers were capable of and that I really wasn’t welcomed there.